Mateship Means Checking In

Suicide and mental health struggles are something that have hit our riding community hard. I don’t claim to have the answers, but I’ve lost too many good mates and family members to know how real this is. The toughest part? You don’t always see it coming. Blokes especially have a way of locking things down — trying to tough it out — until it comes out sideways through anger, booze, shutting themselves off, or walking away from the things they once loved.

That’s why mateship is everything in our scene. You can often spot the little signs: a mate who suddenly doesn’t want to go for a ride, skips a pub night, or pulls away from the crew. On the surface it seems small, but it can point to something much deeper. Sometimes the most important thing you can do is just check in. A quick “How’s things, mate?” might feel simple, but it could be the lifeline they need. I’ll admit, I’ve missed those signs before. Life gets busy in the shed, on the tools, or on the road. Later, you’re left asking yourself those hard questions — what if I’d said something, what if I’d asked the question?

The truth is, you can never check in too often. Even a short chat might be the thing that keeps a mate here.

Personally, I’ve had my share of tough times, but never to the point where I thought the world would be better off without me. Still, I struggle to understand how some of our mates must’ve felt, to believe leaving was the only way forward — especially knowing the families, kids, and riding brothers and sisters who loved them. Suicide doesn’t just take one life; it sends shockwaves through every garage, every ride, every family left behind.

Here’s the reality: in Australia, we lose an average of 9 people every single day to suicide — and around 3 out of 4 are men. Depression isn’t something you can always see. It doesn’t always look sad or obvious. More often than not, it’s hidden behind a laugh, a busy schedule, or that “I’m all good, mate” reply. That’s what makes it so important for us as riders, as mates, as a community, to step in.

It’s not weak to speak up. In fact, it’s one of the bravest things you can do — whether you’re reaching out for help, or you’re the one asking the question.

So here’s the takeaway: look after your mates, and look after yourself. Keep an eye out for the quiet changes, the mate who drifts away, or the one who’s not acting like themselves. Ask the question. Have the chat. You never know — that small check-in could be the thing that keeps a fellow rider in the saddle.

Written by Brett Pearse.

Need to Talk? You’re Not Alone.

If you or a mate are doing it tough, here are some places to reach out

Lifeline – 13 11 14 (24/7 crisis support)

Beyond Blue – 1300 22 4636 (24/7 mental health support)

MensLine Australia – 1300 78 99 78 (support for men)

Suicide Call Back Service – 1300 659 467 (counselling for anyone affected by suicide)

Kids Helpline – 1800 55 1800 (support for young people up to 25)

If it’s an emergency, always call 000.